I was thinking back to when my mom was in hospice. A night or so before my mom died, my brother- in-law, Steve smuggled some beer into my mom’s room. It wasn’t for her, but for those of us keeping vigil. We had a bucket of ice that we put the bottles on. I remember worrying that as the ice melted and shifted and made noise, we’d be busted. Took me right back to my college days. At one point one of the nurses came in while we were enjoying a beer. She just chuckled and said it didn’t bother her any. She went on to tell us that in hospice, if a patient requests alcohol, they try to accommodate them. We joked with her that in that case, Mother wanted a keg in the room. We all laughed about it, because Mother was never one to drink. She hated the taste of alcohol. I think the most she ever consumed at one time was probably a sip of communion wine. My dad wasn’t a drinker either. He would have one can of beer (or as he got older, O’douls) with supper each night, but that was it. So, if there truly is no beer in Heaven, I know that is not a problem for Mother and Daddy.
The thing I sometimes wonder about is when people say there is no marriage in Heaven. I certainly don’t claim to be a biblical scholar and won’t try to quote or interpret what the Bible says on the matter. I can handle that no one gets married once they are in Heaven, but what about the marriages that took place on earth. Are they no longer valid in Heaven? When I think of my mom and dad in Heaven, I still picture them together as husband and wife. It is painful for me to think of them any other way. But then I think about people who have been married more than once. If there is still marriage in Heaven, which spouse will they be married to once they got to Heaven? Now if an earthly marriage ends in divorce, surely the two won't be married in Heaven. But what if a spouse dies and the surviving spouse remarries? What happens when they all get to Heaven? Is this why marriage vows say “Until death do us part”? I try not to think too much on the subject or it starts to feel like I’m losing my mind.
I remember my mom talking about how there is no time in Heaven. She said that when she thought too much about that, it could drive her crazy. I believe there is a reason for why these things make us feel this way. It’s simple really: We are human. As humans, we can only comprehend human things. Time and marriage are human ways. So are fear, pain and anger. Things in Heaven are spiritual. As humans, we do not have a full understanding of spiritual ways. We can’t comprehend an existence without time, pain, anger, eating, drinking, or marriage.
After Daddy died, I had a hard time when I read different bible verses. Some seemed to indicate that when we die, we immediately go to Heaven. Some seemed to say that we remain in the grave until Judgement Day. Some seemed to say we were judged immediately upon death. I asked my pastor about this as it was really bothering me. Pastor Tim gave me some materials from a class he had previously done on death. It included some of the verses I had read and others as well. But what helped me the most was what he told me. First, he said that even though he’s a pastor and has studied the bible, he doesn’t have all the answers. In other words, he’s human too. But he said that the important thing to remember is that God does everything in love. We are human and can’t always understand His ways. But if we have faith, we can be assured that whatever God has planned for us after this life will be wonderful. It is so beautiful and spectacular that our human minds cannot comprehend it. But when we are in Heaven and have full spiritual knowledge, it will all make perfect sense. So our human wonderings about time, marriage or anything else in Heaven should not weigh us down. Rather we should have faith and trust that whatever God has in store for us in Heaven is more wonderful than our wildest dreams. I think I can live with that.
**Pastor Tim, if you happen to read this, I hope I did ok in relaying what you told me. My human mind doesn’t have a perfect memory. But I know your words helped me to feel at peace and know that God has our best interest at heart. I hope that what I wrote can help others to feel that as well.
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