Maxine

Maxine Kathryn Miller was born on February 29, 1924 to Earl O. and Freida Miller in Caledonia, MN. She was a Leap Day baby! Her dad owned the bakery in Caledonia and it is there that he met Freida. There are hundreds of pictures that her parents took of her, but I've only seen one of her with both her parents.

At the age of 18 months, Maxine contracted polio. While many were crippled by the disease, Maxine was one of the fortunate. She always said that her mom wrapped her legs in warm compresses, much like Sister Kenny's treatment years later. Maxine did have to learn to walk again, but didn't have any lasting side effects from the polio. I always wondered though if the arthritis she developed in her back decades later was a result of the polio. 

My mom was an only child. When she was about 4 years old, her mom had an ectopic pregnancy and almost died. Their house was just down the hill from the hospital. From their house, they could see when the operating room lights were on. Being only 4, my mom didn't know that her mom was in surgery. She told me that she saw the operating room lights and commented, "They're cutting a lady's arm off up there!" Fortunately her mom survived.

When Maxine was only 11, her dad died. He had Dropsy (which I believe is now called Edema) and he had suffered a stroke several months before his death. She had a very hard time dealing with that. The dr. told her mom that she needed to take my mom away for a while or she would have a nervous breakdown. I believe they went to her Uncle Bill's farm in Wisconsin for a while.

Less than 7 years later, when my mom was not quite 18, her mom died of breast cancer. Her mom told her dr she knew she had breast cancer and could feel it "crawling" under her skin. The dr dismissed her concern (this was in the early 1940's) and by the time it was confirmed that she had cancer, the treatment was too late. So at the tender age of 17, Maxine was without either parent. And she was an only child. I remind myself of this time and time again when I am missing my parents. I was 45 before I was "orphaned" and I have siblings who understand and feel the loss. My mom had to grow up and take care of herself early on.

After her mom's death, she lived with her Uncle Mike, whom she dearly loved. I believe when Uncle Mike went into the service,  she lived with her Aunt (always called Auntie...pronounced Anty) who was not an easy woman to get along with.

At some point before my grandma died, my parents met. They both went to Young People's Society at St. John's Church, but my mom told me she remembered my dad's brother from there, but not my dad. Where my mom remembered actually meeting my dad was when she and some friends went out into the country to watch some men harvesting hay. My mom and her friends rode in the wagon, on top of the hay, from the field back to the farm. While her friends climbed down once back to the farm, my mom was afraid too. So apparently a nice young man named Earl Betz, took her hand and helped her down. The other men were ribbing Earl that he was sweet on Maxine. I guess they were right! Earl and Maxine dated for a while and then Maxine broke it off. Apparently she had a crush on someone else. I asked my mom once a few years ago why she broke up with him and she told me "Because I was a dumb shit!" My Grandma Miller really liked Earl and was very upset with Maxine when she broke up with him. Grandma told Maxine that she would never find a better man and that Earl cared deeply for her and she had hurt him. I believe she told my mom that she'd never forgive her for hurting him. Sadly, my grandma died before my mom realized that my grandma was right and went and made up with Earl. I firmly believe that the first thing my Grandma told my mom when they saw each other in Heaven was, "I told you so!"

My parents were married on February 24, 1946 and celebrated 63 years together before my dad died on April 16, 2009. Together they had 8 living children. They also had a stillborn daughter born on July 13, 1957. My mom had stopped feeling the baby move and when the baby was born, the umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck. I recall my mom saying that she never saw the baby, but one of my sisters swears my mom told her she did see her briefly. But my dad and the funeral director buried the baby the same night. My sisters Linda and Jo had decided when my mom was pregnant that the baby was going to be a girl and would be named Cindy. Back in those days, when a baby was stillborn, it wasn't common to name them. Her grave marker simply said infant daughter. When my dad passed away and my mom ordered his gravestone, she decided to put the baby's name on the stone as well as my dad's and her own. So 52 years after her birth, the baby was officially named Cindy. When my mom was dying, we told her that when she got to Heaven, to be sure and tell Cindy that she has siblings who love her and will be excited to meet her one day. I figure that after all the years they were apart, it's appropriate for Cindy to have our parents to herself for a while.

Enough of my rambling for now...more is sure to follow.